Monday, October 6, 2008

The Great Pumpkin Face-Off Part Two

We're back to the Pumpkin Patch, dear readers, and we have the real heavy weights in this face-off! In the far right corner, we have one of my favorites, The Reese's Pumpkin:

The crowd here in the Pumpkin Patch is going wild!! Do you see who has joined the Reese's Pumpkin? The KING SIZE Reese's Pumpkin!!!! And for those of you who love and worship peanut butter as I do, this is as close to heaven on earth as you may get. One bite of the King Size and I didn't want to stop! Now here's the danger - 340 calories, this, my friends, is a heavy weight. But (Heidi, I love you, so stop reading here!) well worth 10 of those wretched Russell Stover pumpkins! SMACK DOWN!

Now in the far left corner, we have another entrant to the Pumpkin Wars, another big-time favorite:

The Snickers Pumpkin!!! And the crowd goes crazy!! Peanuts, caramel, creamy nougat - and so fresh!! These pumpkins are all right out of the patch and melt in your mouth. It makes you realize what a difference freshness makes - WOW! Both these pumpkins are fantastic, but this is a no holds barred match, and when the bout begins, Snickers gets naked!

The crowd goes crazy and starts chanting, "Take it off!" "Take it off!" Reese's feels compelled to follow Snickers' lead, and in a show of support, is joined by KING SIZE in the baring of chocolate:

As you can see, this was an ill conceived move on the part of the Reese's Pumpkin. The Snickers Pumpkin has a clearly defined, cool jack-o-lantern face, ridges, a stem, and the poor Reese's pumpkin is, well, a blob. With a stem. Maybe.

Look how big KING SIZE is, by the way. YUM! That, my friends, is a whole lotta peanut butter.

It's still a close match - Snickers has crushed Reese's on aesthetics, but Reese's is soooo good! And who cares about aesthetics? This ain't no stinkin' art museum! At the end of the day, when it comes to chocolate - it's all about the taste.

But, as KING SIZE, is about to cheat and dive onto the Snicker's Pumpkin from the ring ropes, the Mars Marketing Machine pulls up and mentions the website listed on the Snickers Pumpkin wrapper

Uh-oh - marketing is in the Patch! And this is a way cool site - loads of great looking recipes, fun activities made out of candy, even M & M e-cards. It's a marketing SMACK DOWN!! KING SIZE falls too slow, melts to the mat, and the Snickers Pumpkin wins!!!

But Reese's isn't dead yet! Check out the Boo Crew!

That's a Frankenstein, a vampire, and a witch (more chocolate than the Reese's Pumpkins, but still good. And underneath the foil, also blobs.) I think we'll have to call this match a draw. After all, there's room in the Patch for more than one pumpkin.

I'll tell you why this is motivating in the next blog. (Besides the fact that I am now on a sugar high.)

1 comment:

Heidi said...

You, my friend, are hilarious and one crazy peanut-butter lover.
By the way, I was looking up recipes for "Buckeyes" today -- JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE COMING FOR A VISIT.
So hold onto the results of your Great Pumpkin contest until you have a chance to taste a homemade "Russell-Rafferty Buckeye."
(And I still think Russell Stover's rules. But then, it's probably that the maiden-name thing is addling my brain.)