Oompa Loompas and Peanuts

Nestle, like all the other big guns, had a pretty impressive booth at the Expo.  They were giving out samples of Butterfinger Snackerz:

These are crunchy and lighter than the regular Butterfinger.  I don't think they are better, mind you, but they are very good.  They have that awesome Butterfinger center surrounded by a "thin, crispy outer shell" - made of what, I do not know.  The whole thing is covered in chocolate with a drizzle of Butterfinger flavored - something.  These are well worth trying and should be out in convenience stores soon.  So keep your eyes peeled!  Who doesn't like Butterfingers?

This is the other side of the Nestle booth (how cool is Candy Expo?):

These were the samples they were giving out:

The top one is the Scrumdiddlyumptious Bar - made with bits of toffee, cookies and peanuts in milk chocolate.  Sounds amazing!!  I found it only average - hard to believe because I love all three of those!

The second one is the Domed Dark Bar - a dark bar with a milk chocolate "pillow" on top.  Again - average.

The bottom one is the Chocolate Waterfall Bar - see the full size here:

While it looks pretty....

It's not a very exciting bar - average chocolate.  Nothing special.  Pass.

I didn't get this at the Expo, but thought what the heck - it's a milk chocolate bar with graham crackers:

I just don't think Nestle's chocolate is the best - kind of waxy.  The graham crackers make this very sweet - textured like a Nestle Crunch, but sweeter.  There's something about this one that's addictive, even though it's not an incredible chocolate bar.  I had a hard time not eating the whole thing!

This is a limited Edition Snickers bar that Mars debuted at the Expo:

It's Snickers Extreme - all nuts and caramel - no nougat.  Autopsy photo is on the right (regular Snickers on the left):

I thought I would be all over this - loving it even more than the regular Snickers.  But you know what?  I don't!  I have under appreciated the nougat for years!  I prefer the standard Snickers to the Snickers Extreme.  There is nothing wrong with the Snickers Extreme - I mean, how could there be with caramel, peanuts and chocolate?  But I think the regular Snickers is better.  I'd love to hear what you all think.

2010 is the 80th anniversary of the Snickers bar (yep, it came out in 1930).  15 million Snickers are made each day and about 16 peanuts are in each one. 99 TONS of peanuts are used each day.  WOW!  It's the most popular candy bar in the United States.

For those of you who need sugar free candy, Dove may have the answer to your prayers.  Peanut Butter Promises were unveiled at Candy Expo:

They look great and I guess they probably are as far as sugar free goes.  But the regular ones are WAY better.  Sugar rocks!!  ; )

The peanut bar of chocolate lovers might just be this one:

This amazing bar by Green and Black is organic, but more importantly, it's a smooth delicious milk chocolate bar with caramelized peanuts and a hint of sea salt.  It's a wonderful sweet and salty combination with a delicious, high quality chocolate.  Wow!!!!  No Oompa Loompas, but the chocolate here destroys Nestle's.  And it's organic - God knows what toxins are in Wonka's chocolate river. 

Easter Secrets from Beyond the Grave

Okay - if anyone didn't know what the heck I was talking about in the last entry when I said - Okay - there's a robin CARRYING an egg! (Do you think that's an African or a European robin?) This was a reference to Monty Python and the Holy Grail - the whole coconut/swallow episode. My buddy Wally pointed out to me that he had no idea what I was talking about. Sorry - my brain works in very mysterious ways. Thanks, Wally!!

I'm going to have to figure how how to pace my candy reviews better. I have more Easter candy than I have time. And let's face it - who will care after Easter? Heck, I'm not sure who cares now!

But I have made some startling discoveries in today's batch of Easter treats. I've said it before and I'll say it again - the truth is in the autopsy. Let's start with Wonka's Golden Creme Egg:

So much for the illusion of Willie Wonka - there's Nestle stamped on the egg as clear as day. (Where's a good Ooompa Loompa when you need one?)

Now the wrapper describes this as "chocolate creme and caramel with graham flavored cookie pieces in a milk chocolate shell." But the autopsy reveals:

A sadly thin layer of caramel - a swipe really - I don't know where the "chocolate creme" is. See how thick the chocolate "shell" is? This is a lot like a Nestle Crunch bar - I couldn't really tell what the graham flavored cookie pieces were. Could have been graham flavored, could have been those rice crisp things. Not as good as the wrapper makes it sound.

If you want caramel, here's where to look:

Look how oooey, gooey and downright sensuous that is! (That's the best cut I could make, by the way - the caramel was exploding out of there.) That's the best caramel egg I've seen. Now, there's no exotic sea salt, this is ghetto caramel compared to all that, but it is damn good. I mean look at it!!!

Now before we go having the Cadbury Easter parade, I have a bone to pick with them. I loved the regular Cadbury creme egg and I had vivid memories of eating the white creme and the yellow yolk. So delish and so cool because it was like a real egg! So I was thrilled to find these:

The big egg was always a little much - I thought these would be perfect! But look what the autopsy revealed:

Do you see it?? Do you? The horror, the horror! That is ORANGE creme!! ORANGE! These are not supposed to be the orange creme eggs! I cut open a few more just to make sure. How can this be? Do I really have to cut all my candy open to make sure it is what it is supposed to be? The hell with pistachios - the FDA needs to get on this!

But just when you think all is lost:

Yahoo!!! Look at that! That is Butterfinger pieces in a peanut butter creme!!!! Yeah, baby!! This was a great surprise and awesome!!

So what do we learn from this?

Don't judge a candy by its wrapper, a book by its cover or a person by their looks. What matters at the end of the day is what's on the inside.

But don't start autopsying your friends and associates. Time will show you who they are inside - and you can stay out of prison.

I still have no explanation for the Cadbury creme eggs filled with orange. A mistake? An overrun of orange creme? Or an Easter miracle? Some things in life will never be known - like the airspeed velocity of a coconut laden swallow.

Tradition!!

I'm going to digress (surprise!) from the Chocolate Show to go on a Christmas rant.

I want to rant because Christmas trees will not be displayed in the two main libraries at the University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill this year because the library staff thinks "it didn't seem right to celebrate one set of customs when libraries offer information about all belief systems around the world without judgment." I guess the only one they can judge is the Christian one.

Look, let me preface all this by telling you I am one of the least religious people you will run into. I'm not a fan of drawn out prayers (from any religion) at business meetings. I don't go to church - well, the Church of Chocolate. But I love Christmas. I love the candy and the trees and the lights and the Santas. I remember my days at college and I loved when the decorations went up on campus - they were festive and pretty.

I say these politically correct librarians are idiots. If I went into a library in another country and saw decorations displayed from that culture - would I not learn something? Would I not be enriched? If I saw another country's flag flying would I be offended? Are the books in the library offensive because they are in English? Is there a Bible in there? Better get that out quick - someone might be offended! Heck - the Christmas Tree came from a pagan beginning! Can't it just be a festive, holiday decoration? I'm sorry - I just think this is ridiculous. They can't see the beauty for the trees.

So, let's talk about some candy that is breaking tradition. Have you seen all the candy canes out there? Everybody is getting in on this - I saw Bubblicious candy canes, Jolly Rancher candy canes, Jelly Belly candy canes, Dum-Dum candy canes, Life Saver candy canes, Spree candy canes, Sweetarts candy canes, Smarties candy canes, even High School Musical candy canes (what the hell?). And, for us, Wille Wonka Chocolate Flavored Candy Canes in the bi-lingual box. Apparently Willie has a big Spanish speaking following.

Candy cane in Spanish is bastones de dulce. Ole!

Ok - first of all, these are so ugly. They are purple and brown. Not festive.

I wanted to hate them - to tell you they should have never been made. (Nestle makes them, by the way.) But I kind of liked them! And each one only has 50 calories (calorias)! If you like chocolate, want a low calorie treat that no one else will take because they are so ugly - these are for you. (But not for the librarians at UNC - they might be offended.) In fact, I think they should all work on Christmas - isn't it offensive to close the library?

Now Cadbury has an entry. I like the Cadbury eggs - the little candy coated ones (well, I like the big creme filled ones too, but I'm not talking about those. Don't get distracted.). They have much more chocolate in them than M & Ms, their closest competitor in this category. So when I saw the Christmas ones, I was pretty excited.

Okay - something went wrong here. Look at these things! Are they dusty? Did they roll around on the floor of the factory? Do they need to revisit their candy coating process?

Can you say - gross? Again I say, what the hell? Where was quality control? Red and green M & M's in a glass container look great as a decoration. They are shiny - they look delish. I'd be afraid to put these out. Boo!! Give these to the library ladies.

I always love new candy - it is exciting. And even though mint is not my fav, I have always loved the Junior Mint. Low fat - creamy. I have eaten these in many a movie. So when I found these new limited edition inside out Junior Mints, I was excited!!!

These are just terrible. They are like a bad mento filled with some really crappy chocolate like material. Like a chocolate gel - eewww. The Junior Mint is great!!! Tradition!!! These are a blemish on the Junior Mint name and the edition should be limited to as few as possible. BLEECH. Library material.

Now, these are better:

These are just like the traditional Junior Mint, but with some little peppermint sprinkles. I still like the traditional one best because I love its smoothness. But as a holiday offering, these are very festive. And you gotta love that box - very seasonal - would look great in a stocking! And doesn't have any Christian images - the library ladies would be happy. But these you should keep for your friends - the ones who are glad to see decorations for any holiday - and know that the more, the merrier.

Anything that adds beauty to this world is a gift. I hope you get to see much beauty this holiday season. (And get to eat mucho chocolate!)