Halloween and Peanut Butter - Yay!!

I love peanut butter.  I love Halloween.  I was so excited when the Halloween candy starting hitting the shelves.  I kept going back to all my favorite candy haunts (heh, heh, heh - get it, haunts?) looking for the new, the exciting, the different.  And was so disappointed this year.

Sure there were the usual miniature candy bars, but that's the same every year.  We need new, exciting candy - simple pleasures to take our minds off foreclosure rates and unemployment figures.

At least Nestle made a Butterfinger pumpkin:

I like the design - a bit creepy and a bit friendly all at once.  Pretty impressive.

This guy is chocolate with Butterfinger pieces mixed in.  It's okay.  I prefer the mini Butterfingers taste.  Nestle's chocolate isn't as good as their Butterfinger filling.  I'd really like this if it were all Butterfinger filling.  I don't think it would hold together very well, but damn, it would be good!  And it would be orange.  Nestle candy makers - read my blog and make us a Butterfinger (no chocolate) pumpkin!  Crunchy!  Peanut buttery!  Yum!

This is new fall packing for the Reese's Peanut Butter Pumpkins.  I'm still bitter they didn't make the mini ones this year.  But I still think these are the best peanut butter treats on the market.  They still have the old Halloween themed purple packaging from last year (you can see it in last year's post if you really care that much).  Maybe this is so they can keep the Reese's pumpkins on the shelf a little longer - making them a fall treat?  These could stay out through Thanksgiving.

I think we should be giving thanks for these all year long!

This is the only Russell Stover candy I bought this year.  I didn't see anything else new and I hate Russell Stover anyway.  I think they own Whitman's so the marshmallow candy corn was one of theirs too.  I did like it.  But I still hate Russell Stover.  Not as much as the Naked Cowboy, but close.

I was intrigued by this because the wrapper says it's solid peanut butter and it's flat as a pancake.  I wanted to see what it was:

Reese's next to Russell Stover:

My soul mate:

You have got to be kidding!  Why even bother with this? 

No creaminess, the peanut butter taste is too sugary and fake.  It's just a travesty.  Gross.  See why I hate Russell Stover?

I reviewed these last year, but they are so random and weird, I threw them in again this year:

Palmer's Creepy Peepers peanut butter filled eyeballs.  Made with the world's cheapest chocolate but at least they have decent peanut butter filling.  I like the peanut butter but that chocolate is just so waxy and bad.  But they are creepy (in a good Halloweeny way) and the packaging is a riot - "Eye love it, You'll Love it!"  "Another eye-catching idea from Palmer"  Campy!!  Love it!

These are another of my favorites - Hallowscream Caramel Balls from Harry and David:

Oh yes, babies - that is peanut butter wrapped around that caramel center.  These are the best EVAH!  Totally addictive, totally great.  Very peanut buttery and the mix of textures - crunchy candy coating, creamy peanut butter, chewy caramel - genius!!!!!  Get thee to a Harry and David and grab some of these - they are sooooo good!!!!!

I don't know about you, but I'm having fun!!!  I love Halloween and getting to see all the cute kiddies in their costumes!  And what better excuse for a middle aged woman to be stalking the candy aisle? 

Hope you're doing some fun things this week!  I'm gving my "Motivation by Chocolate" session for the hospital staff at Roanoke-Chowan  Hospital.  How much fun are we going to have?    Join in the fun - take some candy to work, wear a costume, or visit a corn maze or haunted house.  Life is short - celebrate!

Chocolate Christmas Shopping

Tracy and I hit the stores on Saturday (I know - crazy, right?) and everyplace was pretty packed. Recession over? We're all just bored? Last minute panic? Who knows? But I was still looking for candy. (I mean, it ain't over till it's over!) And I found a few missing items I felt compelled to cover.

First there's another Christmas Whopper. This is just the regular old Whopper in a Christmas box. Not bad, not extraordinary - I like the Sno-balls better. And you know how I feel about the attempt to trick us by only changing the packaging. But this is pretty cute packaging and these would make a great stocking stuffer.

Where I really missed the sleigh was with peppermint. I don't really love peppermint and chocolate, but I can't escape it this time of year. First there's a new Bliss (at least new to me) and not specifically Christmas, but what the hell:

These were not my fav. In fact, I'm going to go so far as to say that I don't like these at all. There's some funky aftertaste. Toothpaste? Lighter fluid? Poison?

Tracy spotted these at Target, and they are pretty festive. Look how gorgeous:

There are four in the pack - and the best part? No Martha Stewart!!! Yay!!

They are really thin:

Wow! This is my favorite peppermint bark - love the thinness - making it not too chocolately and not too rich. Love the crunchy peppermint chunks on top and LOVE, LOVE, LOVE how pretty it is! Also like the dark and white chocolate with the peppermint (rather than milk and white like Ghirardelli). And I almost didn't try it! Thanks, Tracy, for spotting it! Thanks, Dove, for making it! And thanks, Martha, for not ruining it with your lame advice.

And now I have some pics of my favorite peppermint/chocolate combo (other than the Dove bark -it's moved to the top spot for me!):

The Lindor truffle is just so amazingly smooth and creamy it's hard to beat. It has the best chocolate, but I really like those festive peppermint chunks on the Dove bark. I like the mix of textures and the Dove bark is just so damn pretty! If you see the Dove bark - get it - it's fantastic!!!

We also spotted these and I had to get them for my tree:

How great are those?? I love them! $1 at Target and they have candy in them. Now, don't get excited about the candy, this is all that in there:

That's pretty weak, huh? How about the TWO Tootsie Rolls? I mean, why even bother? But I really do like the ornaments - look for them in the stocking stuffer section of Target if you like them too.

I thought I'd leave you with some tips Martha might share:

Get to the stores early, they won't be as crowded.

Wear comfortable shoes while shopping so you don't get crabby.

Consider taking endless hours to make gifts by hand. Your time isn't worth nearly as much as mine, so you might as well waste it.

Don't scream obscenities or make rude hand gestures in the parking lot. Some of the women I met in prison have been released.

And finally,

If you are allergic to any foods, don't eat them.

Happy Shopping!!!!

Easter Secrets from Beyond the Grave

Okay - if anyone didn't know what the heck I was talking about in the last entry when I said - Okay - there's a robin CARRYING an egg! (Do you think that's an African or a European robin?) This was a reference to Monty Python and the Holy Grail - the whole coconut/swallow episode. My buddy Wally pointed out to me that he had no idea what I was talking about. Sorry - my brain works in very mysterious ways. Thanks, Wally!!

I'm going to have to figure how how to pace my candy reviews better. I have more Easter candy than I have time. And let's face it - who will care after Easter? Heck, I'm not sure who cares now!

But I have made some startling discoveries in today's batch of Easter treats. I've said it before and I'll say it again - the truth is in the autopsy. Let's start with Wonka's Golden Creme Egg:

So much for the illusion of Willie Wonka - there's Nestle stamped on the egg as clear as day. (Where's a good Ooompa Loompa when you need one?)

Now the wrapper describes this as "chocolate creme and caramel with graham flavored cookie pieces in a milk chocolate shell." But the autopsy reveals:

A sadly thin layer of caramel - a swipe really - I don't know where the "chocolate creme" is. See how thick the chocolate "shell" is? This is a lot like a Nestle Crunch bar - I couldn't really tell what the graham flavored cookie pieces were. Could have been graham flavored, could have been those rice crisp things. Not as good as the wrapper makes it sound.

If you want caramel, here's where to look:

Look how oooey, gooey and downright sensuous that is! (That's the best cut I could make, by the way - the caramel was exploding out of there.) That's the best caramel egg I've seen. Now, there's no exotic sea salt, this is ghetto caramel compared to all that, but it is damn good. I mean look at it!!!

Now before we go having the Cadbury Easter parade, I have a bone to pick with them. I loved the regular Cadbury creme egg and I had vivid memories of eating the white creme and the yellow yolk. So delish and so cool because it was like a real egg! So I was thrilled to find these:

The big egg was always a little much - I thought these would be perfect! But look what the autopsy revealed:

Do you see it?? Do you? The horror, the horror! That is ORANGE creme!! ORANGE! These are not supposed to be the orange creme eggs! I cut open a few more just to make sure. How can this be? Do I really have to cut all my candy open to make sure it is what it is supposed to be? The hell with pistachios - the FDA needs to get on this!

But just when you think all is lost:

Yahoo!!! Look at that! That is Butterfinger pieces in a peanut butter creme!!!! Yeah, baby!! This was a great surprise and awesome!!

So what do we learn from this?

Don't judge a candy by its wrapper, a book by its cover or a person by their looks. What matters at the end of the day is what's on the inside.

But don't start autopsying your friends and associates. Time will show you who they are inside - and you can stay out of prison.

I still have no explanation for the Cadbury creme eggs filled with orange. A mistake? An overrun of orange creme? Or an Easter miracle? Some things in life will never be known - like the airspeed velocity of a coconut laden swallow.

The Grand Finale!

Happy Valentine's Day!!!


Sorry for my slackness in blogging. I have been doing a lot of dating since my recent relationship fiasco and it is sooooo time consuming! Those of you who are married, give your spouse a big kiss. The grass is definitely NOT greener out here. That's one of the big challenges in relationships - we always think there might be something better...... (we do the same thing with jobs, houses - lots of things). Us crazy humans are never satisfied, and therefore, never happy.

Well, here's something that really satisfies:

I love Snickers. I already showed you one of the terrific Valentine's Day assortments with the miniature Snickers bars, but look at these!! They taste delicious - and I love the design. I think this is one of the best looking Valentine's Day chocolates I've seen. Love it!! A+ for design and A+ for taste.

My first love (and at this rate, perhaps my last) is chocolate. Think of this entry as the grand finale, featuring a wild bombardment of all the Valentine's Day treats I have yet to review. (Feel free to say "Oooh" and "Ahh" just like you would at the fireworks finale on the 4th of July.)


Butterfinger and Crunch have the same packaging:

Notice the Spanish on the packaging. Much of our candy is now made in Mexico. More about that in an upcoming entry.



These are solid offerings if you like Crunch and Butterfinger. You can get the little foil wrapped guys or the larger single hearts. These are designed to compete with the Reese's Heart, I'm sure. (But they are no competition in my book. The Reese's Heart crushes there.) I also think the chocolate is sub par - kind of waxy. Of the two, I prefer the Butterfinger because I'm a sucker for peanut butter. But these are only average.

They aren't finished yet!





I like the Mini Butterfinger bars better. Solid blocks of peanut buttery crispness - yay! This assortment also has Mini Baby Ruth bars. I like the Baby Ruth - love the nuts and the chewy nougat. What about you all? What are your favorites?

Like the colors and the hearts:




Hershey's has another entry I found in the Hallmark store. I have completely given up on Russell Stover - glaack!! No mas!! Although Stover dominates in the boxed chocolate selection and they had some hilarious and gorgeous heart shaped boxes this year, I'm just not buying any more of that yucky chocolate.



If you like marshmallow - this is for you! It is simply a huge slab of marshmallow coated with Hershey's chocolate. Better than Russell Stover, but I really don't want this much marshmallow. Peanut better, yes! Marshmallow, no. I do, however, really like the package design. The touches of turquoise - very classy. I would totally buy this wrapper on a t-shirt.

Now here's a surprise out of left field:




This is Valentine Taffy from some random company called Sweet Time. I found it at Walgreens. It is completely addictive and I'm not even sure what the flavors were. (After eating the ENTIRE bag, I don't know what the flavors were. I know, I scare myself.) One tasted kind of like watermelon. All were REALLY good - I am NOT kidding! Low fat too! If you see these, they are totally cheap - buy them! I'm going to try to get some more. I think my dentist will love Sweet Time. Maybe it is run by dentists.





The clever packaging award goes to Toblerone:




Toblerone Bars are awesome. Great shape, great chocolate. This is the same old bar, but how perfect to make it look like a rose? GREAT job!! My picture doesn't do it justice - it really is a gorgeous looking rose. Oooh! Ahhh!


And my heroes at Vitalicious (of the 100 calorie, vitamin, protein, fiber packed treats) have a fantastic Valentine's Day offering:


Look at that gorgeous box! It contains a dozen, delicious 100 calorie heart-shaped cakes. How cute are these? And can you tell how moist they are? They are thick too - about 2.5 inches. The perfect, decadent but low cal treat. Oooh!!! Aaah!!!



I hope you had a great Valentine's Day and if you have someone in your life you love, you take a few minutes to really appreciate them. It is so easy to take your loved ones for granted. And I hope you all know how much you mean to me!!! This Valentine's Day would have been a lot harder without all your kind words and support! And thanks for taking the time to read this crazy blog!!

Russell Stover's Last Stand

I was sorely disappointed by Russell Stover's Halloween chocolate. But I am willing to give them one more chance. Having unwrapped their offerings, my hopes are not high.

Let's talk Santa.

These are Nestle's Santas:





They are coaster sized disks with a cute Santa face and each says Santa Claus is Comin' to Town! The Butterfinger disk is awesome! I love Butterfingers, so that was not surprising. The Crunch is okay. To me all Crunch is only okay. Bland, waxy chocolate - pass. It's the peanut butter that saves the Butterfinger Santa and the chocolate seems better than that in the Crunch. But I could just be deluded by the peanut butter.

Now look at this:




Do you see those blobs? Those are "Santas" according to Russell Stover. Maybe mummies. Maybe potatoes. One looks like the Pope. They ain't Santas. I put in Snickers Nutcracker to make it even more clear how lame the RS Santas are.

I mean, come on! Did they even try? You can see the buttons on the Nutcracker's jacket! I can barely make out "Santa's" head! BOO on aesthetics. Coal and switches, RS.

But let's talk taste. RS's caramel Santa was not too bad. Nothing extraordinary, but not bad. I still don't like the way their chocolate just crumbles. Not melts - cracks, crumbles. Snickers' Nutcracker is better - you've got caramel and peanuts and I like the chocolate better.

The coconut cream Santa is okay if you REALLY like coconut cream - it's sweet, with coconut chunks but not creamy. It has the consistency of marshmallow. I found it gross. The coconut Santa (not cream, just coconut) is an inferior version of an Almond Joy with no almond. (And not much joy.)

There's also a coconut wreath (apparently RS goes all out with coconut at Christmas. I don't think of coconut as a Christmas treat, but hey, why not?) Better than VEGETABLES.

Again, aesthetics not so good. I'm not going to elaborate - you can see for yourself. BUT - this was my favorite of the RS treats! I'm surprised! I like it! Hey, Mikey! RS may not be dead to me yet! I would actually buy this again. It's not a chocolate coated thing like the others, the chocolate is mixed with the coconut and it's nice and moist. YUM! No switches!!

Remember Russell Stover's infamous Buzzard Egg at Halloween? The one I busted for being an Easter Egg repackaged and repackaged badly? Well, it's BAAAACK!

And the competition is none other than the Cadbury Ornament Creme Egg! (Hey -at least they tied it to Christmas and called it an ornament - RS just said "Marshmallow and Caramel" and stuck a Santa picture on the label.

Here they are naked - at least Cadbury tried to make theirs look seasonal:

Russell Stover is just sticking with the Easter decoration year round. RS is lazy in the aesthetics department. More coal and switches. Santa is SO watching! (And he's not laughing at the Pope thing.)

Let's look inside these babies, where the yolk meets the egg!

Now, there really is no competiton here. The first picture is RS - there is a big hole where caramel should be. And look at that spongy marshmallow! Something is just not working here - I don't know what happens to the caramel. There's some weird liquid between the marshmallow and the chocolate so maybe it's caramel. I don't know. I didn't like it as a buzzard egg and I don't like it as a weird Santa egg.

The Cadbury egg is much better - it actually looks like an egg, it's creamy and delicious. Although I have to confess that it is a little too sweet for me. But it blows RS out of the nest.

So here are my favs - the Butterfinger Santa disk, the Snickers Nutcracker, and the RS Wreath. I higly recommend them all - they are relatively inexpensive and taste pretty darn good.

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas! Ho, ho, ho!!!