Friday, August 22, 2008

Ice Cream Heaven and Hell

Yes, dear readers, I am keeping you on the cutting edge of America's cravings. Yesterday I talked about the expanding and exciting candy aisle. Today USA Today devoted an entire FOUR pages to dessert! One of the headlines reads "Despite diets or budgets, America will always make room for dessert." Yay!

Some of the desserts are wacky and exotic (just like some of the new chocolate bars), some are just down home delicious (also like some of the chocolate bars). USA Today highlighted the South, Chicago and New York City. I'm proud to say the South has what looks best to me - peanut butter pie, cream cheese pound cake, giant chocolate cake. Chicago has some desserts that scare me - one involves pop rocks, another lots of lavender (ugh). New York, of course, has it all.

If you have a spare $25,000 you can go to Serendipity3 in NYC and get a sundae - a blend of 28 cocoas, covered in 23K edible gold-infused whipped cream, topped with the most expensive chocolate in the world (La Madeline au Truffle) served in a goblet lined with chocolate. An 18K gold and 1K white diamond bracelet decorates the base of the goblet - and you get to keep that, as well as an 18K gold spoon encrusted with black, white and chocolate diamonds. Whoa - girls, this creates a whole new potential for the words "Sugar Daddy."

I guess I'm just not sophisticated - some of the wild new flavors just don't to it for me - especially when they start messing with ice cream. USA Today asks a question I'm sure I will use again - "Just because you can do it, does it mean that you should?" These ice cream flavors make me say not just no, but hell no!:

14 vegetable (including zucchini)
squid ink
oyster
roasted garlic sorbet
Parmesan
malted barley
Thai chili
smoked pine nuts
mashed potato (did they just serve them really cold?)
lobster
Memphis barbecue
tomato basil
cucumber

I'm sorry - those are just wrong. If there's an ice cream hell, the creators of those flavors are going. If there's an ice cream heaven, it costs $25,000. Can I get an "Amen"?

1 comment:

Heidi said...

Amen.

And people from Chicago are weird.
The things they do to hot dogs and pizza should be enough evidence that any dessert they create will follow the same frightening course.