Hiding, Stealing, and Licking Chocolate

Chocolate rules!!! These are excerpts from an article in The Times of India (my random comments are in italics).

Half of the women in a recent international study revealed that chocolate gives them pleasure similar to sex. (The other half probably said it was better.) The research also said that close to 80% of women consider chocolate to be an aphrodisiac. In fact, women love chocolate so much that they would stoop to even feigning pregnancy for it. (Okay, I am very scared by that. Just how does feigning pregnancy get you chocolate?)

Indian women have also admitted that they can even beg, borrow or steal to indulge in their “cardinal sin”. This known-though-never-studied (gotta love that hyphenation) fact comes from a poll by Axe Research Lab on 3,571 women across 13 countries. The study shows that women of any country and any origin would hide chocolate to avoid sharing it with others. (They needed a survey for this?)

In fact, Indian women are only second to Brazilians in hiding their chocolates. While a shocking 84.9% of 225 respondents from Brazil thought it fine not to share their “pieces of sin” with others by hiding it, 75.9% of the 220 Indians surveyed, thought along the same lines. In fact, Indian women seem more desperate to get a piece of chocolate or to save their chocolates from others. A high 22.7% of Indian respondents said they would not think twice before stealing chocolate from a friend. (Note - do not take your chocolate to India!)

This is the highest percentage across all the countries surveyed. Only Brazilians and Mexicans come somewhat close. Indians also scored high using a fake excuse to get chocolate. Some admitted to even stooping to fake their birthday for it. Interestingly, some said they would prefer licking their pieces of chocolate to avoid having to share it with others. About 31.4% of Indians agreed to fake birthdays, and an even higher 46.8% said they’d be happy to lick their bits to prevent others from taking a bite. (Note - if anyone in India offers you chocolate, don't take it.)

How great is this survey? World peace through chocolate I tell you! It may be the only thing we can all agree on. But I am intrigued by the licking strategy. How exactly would this work? If you and I were in a store together and I bought a candy bar, would I immediately lick the entire thing so you wouldn't be tempted to ask for any? What do I do with M & M's? And what about the pregnancy angle? Do I send out birth announcements in the hopes that everyone will shower me with chocolate? Or do I just tell everyone that I'm pregnant and having intense chocolate cravings?

Ah - the things we'll do for love.